WHEN, that is a powerful word. It means in the event of or if certain factors exist.
You know you are going to recover from a wounded heart when…
1. When you pray about your problem more than you think about your problem.
The Bible gives simple but profound advice in James 5:13 “Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. “. This verse flatly calls prayer a painkiller. Here is the habit you need: replace the paralysis of analysis with prayer. Turn all of those thoughts of regret and anger in to prayer. Take all of the energy you use to figure out your crisis and divert it into prayer. When thoughts of dread and shame assail you at night funnel them into prayer.
God does want you to talk about your enemies; He just wants you to do it in the secret place of prayer. Here you can scream and complain all you want about your enemies. Here is where you vent and rage against your misfortune. 1Peter 5: 6, 7 Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.
During intense emotional pain, negative thoughts race through your mind. You analyze, rehearse, and regret and day dream about your problem. You worry, you fret and you want to lash out. This torture can only deepen your wound. Submerge all of your these thoughts in prayer. You must develop this automatic reaction.
2. When you examine your own faults more, than you examine the faults of your enemy.
Jonathan Edwards said,” A true saint of God is suspicious of nothing more than his own heart.” We are very complex creatures capable of hidden motives. Have you ever noticed that when you drive on the freeway that the person in front of you is going too slowly and that person behind you is going too fast? That is because we assume that we and we alone are driving the right speed.
. Even if you are clearly not the one at fault for your heartbreak that does not mean that you are innocent. It takes deep wisdom to examine yourself when you feel violated. There are big reasons for examining yourself. For one thing, you never want to go through this again so it is urgent for you to see why you chose a wrong mate or how you opened yourself up for disaster.
However, if you ask me the biggest reason why, in the face of even the greatest betrayal that you should examine yourself it is about power. As long as you focus on your enemy, you give then power. When you fixate on people over whom you have no control, it only increases your sense of anger and helplessness. If instead you divert that energy into a partnership with Jesus to build a new and better you healing speeds up.
3. When you want God to clear your path more than you want Him to clear your name. . In any crisis, there are lies. I am sure that someone has lied about you. You want to clear your name. Do not do that, clearing your name is your last resort. There were only a few times in my life where God allowed me to defend myself. The only times when I was free to speak in my own defense is when God was at work defending me and allowed me to be a small part of His miracle. When God says, “Vengeance is mine”, He is not kidding!
Lawsuits only bless attorneys. A war of words leaves no winners. A divorce battle is like a gunfight between Siamese twins. Withdraw your foot from strife. Let it go.
Here is a life sign for you…when you want direction from God more than you want vindication from man you are assured that you will live again , love again and laugh again. If you put your energy into finding and heading in the right direction, God will work on clearing your name.
4. When you realize that what you have gained is greater than what you have lost.
So much of our walk with God has to do with the unimaginable. Paul tried to explain to the immature Corinthians the treasure that God would reveal in due time. 9 But as it is written “Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man The things which God has prepared for those who love Him.”
A new love is going to come in to your life that you cannot imagine right now. A new career is right around the corner held in trust by the mighty hand of God. But something far better has happened. Your compassion has deepened. Your appreciation for so many things has skyrocketed. The old cliché is right… “He will give you double for your trouble!”
The story of Job can give us a lopsided perspective. His entire ordeal lasted about nine months but it led to a lifetime of well, there is that word again “unimaginable” blessing.I do not want to minimize your loss I know it was great. You can never replace loved ones who have passed on. God is not trying to give you a substitute for your loss but a new and different blessing. Your old dream has died but a new and unique dream is coming.
In the coma of heartbreak, you forget how many people love you, how many of your fears are unfounded, how much opportunity is out there, and how much power there is in just trying one more time.